You Fill My Heart
by SLobsessedfan2
Summary: Ricky and Amy are newly engaged but will the stresses of that next step in their relationship push them over the edge? Add that to the everyday struggle of teen parenthood which will also be rocked. Will they get through, or will it tear them apart?
1. Preview

**Hey there everyone! This is my 3****rd**** fic so I thought I would post a little preview for it. Now before I start I would just like to say that this story is very similar to that of a different author in ways If anyone has ever read 'Here We Go Again' and 'Adjusting' by Riverbkstar you will see the similarities. I respect that author a lot and I am a huge fan of her fics, they are so well written and put together and I list her writing skills as an inspiration for this story and I apologize in advance for the similarities I am in NO way trying to copy her just putting my ideas for a fic into words (It's been in my head far too long). But anyway here is the preview again inspired by Riverbkstar in the way of a YouTube video because being a vidder myself it makes a lot of sense to preview something this way. Some of this goes in order but some does not. So now I'm going to shut up and let you read. **

**Preview…**

**Screen fades in**- Lights are blaring

**Scene flips **

R: "Hey you ok?"

Amy is biting her lip with tears in her eyes

**Scene flips**

Nurse calls "John Juergens"

John stands in his pjs clutching Amy's pant leg "Mommy no I scared!"

**Scene flips **

A: "maybe this was a bad idea?"

R: "You worry way too much"

**Scene flips**

Amy hands Ricky a half folded napkin. Ricky takes it and opens it

R: "w-w-what"

A: has tears in her eyes "I'm pregnant…."

**Scene flips **

A: "how are we going to do this?"

R: "I don't know but we are in this together"

**Scene flips**

Amy and Ricky are staring at each other nervously

Doctor: "Well that was quite a scare young lady"

Amy nods head

R: "So everything is ok then Doc?"

Doctor: "Well…."

**Scene flips **

Amy is standing at a locker with her phone in her hands

**Scene flips **

Ricky runs out of a room "GET AWAY FROM HER!"

**Scene flips **

Amy's doubled over screaming. (Background- sirens are blaring)

**Scene flips **

Frantic Amy "No, no, no, I can't!"

Ricky has complete terror on his face.

**Scene flips**

Amy and Ricky are in a heated argument

R: "I'm not lying Amy!"

A: "I don't believe you! In fact here!" (She throws her ring at him)

**Scene flips **

"That's it keep going Amy almost there!"

A: "This really hurts!"

R: "I'm so sorry"

**Scene flips **

"It's a….."

**Scene flips **

Ricky is in his car tears down his face as his fists pound leather

**Scene flips **

Amy on a floor blood down her arms…

**Scene flips **

Ricky is sitting by a big bright Christmas tree when he is handed something

R: "You have got to be kidding me"

**Scene flips**

Ricky and Amy stand side by side, his hand on her back while she rests her head against his arm.

**Scene flips **

Amy walks through the door a solemn look on her face.

R: "well?"

**Scene flips **

Ricky and Amy share a kiss under the breezeway of their kitchen.

Amy turns her head "oh my- did you just see that?"

**Scene flips **

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

**Scene flips **

R: "So are you sure about this?"

A: "More than anything!"

**Scene flips**

Ricky is confronting Amy with something in his hand "what is this?"

**Scene flips **

Everyone is gathered around a long black box waiting tears in their eyes their hearts heavy.

**Scene flips **

Ricky has an angry look on his face looking at Amy

R: "I don't know any more Amy"

A: "About what?"

R: "us"

**Screen fades to black.**

**You Fill My Heart coming soon!**


	2. Nightmares

**Disclaimer- I don't own Secret Life, Brenda Hampton does. If I did own SL it would be 100% better then it is and Ricky and Amy would be the highlights instead of these stupid new people!**

**Hey there! Ok so this is the first chapter of this new story and It's a little confusing to keep up with which is what I wanted to experiment with. Im going to try to update this story whenever I have time and inspiration to write and right now Secret Life is 2 episodes away from going back to hiatus so hopefully I will have some time to write more at night. Im starting school Wednesday- major sad face **

**So here it is…. Nightmares!**

Amy was sitting at the kitchen table watching the clock tick by, it was a little after 9 where was Ricky? John had fallen asleep on the sofa.

The door opened and Ricky walked through. He smiled when he saw John and Amy, but his smile quickly faded when he saw Amy's expression. "What?"

She rose an eyebrow at him "What do you mean what? Ricky it's after 9 where the hell have you been?"

"I was out for a little bit its ok I wasn't doing anything"

"What could you possibly be doing out at 9pm?"

"I went out somewhere"

"Uh huh and where did you go?"

"Just out that's it nothing harmful in that so would you calm down"

She put her hands on her hips "No I will not calm down! Ricky it's after 9 your just now coming in the door I ask you where you gave been and you tell me out. What about your family Ricky? We're sitting here waiting for you and your out! You don't answer my calls or texts and I'm not supposed to think you weren't doing something!"

"Why are you so mad that I was out? You go out sometimes and I don't say anything about it" his voice was slowly rising.

"That's different because I go out with Madison and Lauren! You know them and we don't do anything when we do go out. How am I not supposed to worry?" He exchanged an annoyed glace and it grew silent for a few minutes.

Amy crossed her arms and rose her eyebrow once more "Was it that girl?" Ricky looked up a puzzled look on his face "What?" she crossed her arms "You know that girl you said you used to be friends with. Was it her you were with?"

"No why would I be with Clementine?"

"Oh is that the slut's name?"

"What are you talking about Amy?"

"I'm talking about that slut of a friend of yours Clementine, and what kind of name is that anyway, Clementine it sounds like a brand of soap! Which she probably needs to clean the slut of her" she replied rolling her eyes at him.

He caught her eye roll "Amy that's enough seriously you don't even know her, she's a nice girl"

"Oh she's a nice girl? Uh huh so I'm supposed to just like her because she's nice? Ha yeah right why would I be nice to that slut whos trying to screw my fiancé?"

"What the- Amy she's not trying to screw me! She's just a friend!"

"Yeah well we were just friends once too" She retorted bitterly.

His head titled up rolling his eyes while tucking in his bottom lip "Wow, you're kidding me right? What is wrong with you? Why are you in such a hateful mood tonight?"

"Because while you were out wherever you were I was here taking care of john after a long day of stupid school and screaming kids at work. I've had a bad day and it didn't get any better when I called the bank after work and found out were nearly broke! Where did all our money go Ricky, huh?" Amy asked with suspicion in her tone.

Ricky was taken aback by her question "Why are you asking me that?"

"Oh no reason"

"Yeah there is a reason what are you thinking I'm doing? Do you think that I'm… that I'm cheating on you or something?" She was silent and stared at the ground.

His eyes became wide and angry. "Oh my god Amy you are thinking that! How could you possibly be thinking that?" She said nothing. "Answer me!" He demanded angrily.

"I don't have to do anything" she retorted.

"Fine!" He took a seat in the chair closest to the door; Amy remained standing in her spot her eyes locked on him seeing the anger clear on his face.

The apartment was silent for 30 minutes more. Nobody spoke only the sound of john's soft snores could be heard. Finally Amy broke the silence "So where did you go tonight?" Ricky's head snapped in her direction "Can we just drop it, it's over now"

"No its not, not until you tell me where you were." She snapped tapping her foot impatiently on the hard wood floor.

"Fine then" He rose to face her "You want the truth? Fine here it is. I went to the campus and had coffee Clementine was there working but she took a break and sat down and we talked, that's it."

"Ah ha! So you were with her!"

"What with? No not with her like that, I meant with her as in in the same room at the same table. We talked that was it Amy, I swear"

"Uh huh and I'm just supposed to believe that because you swear?" He nodded "Ummm no let me see your phone" He gave her a confused look "Um why?"

"So I can talk to this clementine girl and ask her what happened tonight" She stuck her hand out towards him. Ricky rolled his shoulders in frustration before just giving in and placing his phone in her hands anything to avoid a huge all night argument.

Amy took the phone and started scrolling through the contacts until she landed on Clementine's name and clicked call. It rang a few times before a woman picked with a chipper voice. "Ricky?"

Amy never took her eyes off Ricky as she spoke "Umm no this isn't Ricky this is his fiancée, Amy" It was silent for a few seconds before Clementine replied "Oh… well hi there, can I help you with something?"

"Uh yeah actually you can, you can tell me what the hell you and Ricky were doing out together tonight! Because he insists it was just talking"

"Well uh... Ricky is right we were together tonight but- click the phone hung up. Amy ended the phone call and looked at Ricky, anger in her eyes "See I knew you two were together tonight!"

Ricky's eyes grew wide. "What the hell are you talking about? Did you not just call Clementine and hear her say we were talking!" his tone was furious now and had become increasingly louder than usual.

"Ricky I won't deal with you lying and cheating on me! I just won't! Her voice raised an octave higher.

"Nobody is cheating or lying here Amy!"

"Don't lie to me again! I knew you were out with her tonight and when I asked you, you said no! That was a lie Ricky! You went out with another girl tonight!"

"Just to talk!"

"Please Ricky we both know you can't just 'talk' to women."

That remark set Ricky over the edge "Well you would know wouldn't you. Oh wait no you wouldn't because if you did you wouldn't have that stupid ring on your finger! For the last time I'm not lying!"

By this time John had awoken from the screaming and sat up watching his parents.

Amy just stared at him tears were welling in her eyes as she replayed the words he just spoke just seconds ago, barely muttering a stuttered "w-w-what?"

He looked at her realizing what he just said his eyes became soft and guilt rained on his face. "Amy… I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it, I was just angry" he took a step forward to put his arms around her but she only pushed them away.

"No! Don't touch me!" she slid the ring off her finger while tears starting to make their way down her cheeks. "I thought this was the token of your love for me and wanting me to become your wife! But I guess I was wrong so you know what…" she looked at the ring in her fingers "HERE!" she threw the ring at his face, grabbed john and stormed off slamming and locking the bedroom door behind her.

Ricky just stood still in shock of what just happened.

He starred down at the hardwood floor noticing the gleam from the diamond ring that lay by his left foot. He crotched down and picked it up tears now in his eyes as he held the heart shaped band, one of his tears hitting the gleaming silver. He was an idiot.

Amy lay on the tiny twin bed with John snuggled next to her, her tears making his hair wet as he laid there under his mother's arm. His tiny eyes fluttered in confusion. Not knowing why his mommy was crying, all he knew was that his mommy and daddy had been in a fight earlier and that she usually didn't cry after they fought.

He lifted his tiny hand and placed it on her head, lighting stroking her hair like he saw his dad do so many times before.

Amy began crying harder and tighting her grip on John, as he continued stroking her hair "shhh mommy".

After about 20 minutes Amy's crying stopped as she fell asleep.

Ricky sat with tears sliding down his face, the ring still in his grip. He just couldn't make himself put it down because even after several tears had hit it. It never lost its gleaming shine much like Amy; she could fight, scream, curse, throw things and slam doors but never lost the gleam and love in her eyes. Well except for maybe tonight but it wouldn't last that long, they would work it out he knew they would, or at least he prayed they would.

He got up and walked towards the bedroom grabbing the key from the top of the door and opening it.

Amy lay there in the little twin bed buried in the pillows, her knees bent to her chin; John beside her still had his little hand on her head while his body was snuggled close to his mother.

Not wanting to disturb them he walked out and headed to the kitchen. Taking a sticky note from the drawer and scratching out a note before grabbing his keys and jacket and heading out the door to clear his head.

Amy awoke when John fidgeted his leg, kicking her in the process. Letting an "Ow" past her horse voice and lifting her head from the tear soaked pillow.

John laid there a look of contentment on his face. She smiled lightly stroking his left cheek silently laughing at how chubby her baby boy's cheeks were even with his cute little dimples. Her movements were slow trying to remove herself from the tiny mattress, not wanting to wake him.

The house was too quite she noted with a concerned look on her face, which quickly subsided after feeling her naked hand. Fighting back the tears she walked into the kitchen to get a snack, the clock over the stove said 10:17pm. As she was getting her a bowl of cereal she noticed the note on the table reading it out loud to herself.

"Amy, I'm sorry I said what I did, I didn't mean it I was just so angry at you for accusing me of cheating and lying to you. I'm sorry if I upset you or made you feel as if your love was a burden. The truth is without you I have nothing, I am nothing. Don't worry this note is not to tell you I'm leaving, although I did leave for a little while. I needed some air to clear my head. Don't worry though I'm safe and will be back soon, I love you and john with all my heart – love, Ricky."

Amy put the note back down her face red with anger "Of course he's going to go off and take one of those stupid walks he takes all the time!" But in her mind he was doing a lot worse. She shook her head a few times to erase those thoughts and sat down on the sofa spooning cocoa pebbles into her mouth.

John emerged from the shadows of the hallway plopping on the couch to join his mom and steal her snack; she stifled a cereal filled chuckle and spooned a mouthful of cocoa pebbles into John's mouth before getting off her spot from the sofa and going back into the kitchen, setting the bowl on the counter.

"I'm still hungry John what do you think we should eat?"

"Ice ceme!" shouted the two year old.

Amy looked at him "That actually doesn't sound bad, it's only 10 something, let's go!"

"YAY!" john clapped and ran to the door still fully dressed from the day.


	3. Terrible Things

**Hiya everybody! I wanna thank you guys sooooo much for the reviews they mean more then you know! :) **

**I updated! Yay! I just started school recently but was told all my classes have minimal to no homework so I hope to write a lot more, fingers crossed! Alright going into this keep in mind its a continuation of last chapter. Also I forgot to mention this in the preview All my chapter names are songs. But not all the song titles have anything to do with the chapter itself, I just really love music :P **

**I dont own Secret Life yadda yadda yadda- although I really wish I did because I guarantee it would be awesome! Alright enough of this long note. Have fun reading! **

Ricky is driving listening to the radio the soothing melody of Every Avenue's 'The Story Left Untold' filled the car and seeped into his ears taking in each word of the song as a piece of his life. He held the ring in his hand as he continued to drive his phone was beside him.

Seeing the light flash alerting him of a new message little did he know it was the last light he saw before glass shattered and metal crunched leaving his weary body slumped over….

Amy and john were blasting to the radio of her SUV driving down the highway the rhythm of Taylor Swift's "Our song" pulsing through the speakers.

Amy looked back at John who was perfectly content playing with his bear. She was about to ask him something when all of a sudden a cop car came speeding past her followed by an ambulance.

John was startled by the noises of the vehicles and started to whimper. Amy put her hand on his knee for reassurance everything was going to be fine, little did she know what she was about to behold….

A cop car pulled up to the road followed by an ambulance carrying 3 EMT's who burst out the back doors stretcher in tow. They walked over to the scene attempting to pull a young man out of the wreckage but it wasn't gonna budge they needed the jaws of life.

An EMT worker shouted over to one of the cops "This doesn't look good! He's losing a lot of blood fast and I can't pull him out!"

The cop looked at the ground "Bring in the jaws of life then!".

Seeing that Johns frantic whimpers weren't going to cease Amy pulled over the side of the road and kept reassuring john that everything was fine. But when she went to stare at the road in front of her, her gaze locked on something she didn't want to see. she blinked fast thinking it was just her eyes playing tricks on her. sure enough it wasn't the sight before her was that of a horrific car crash. she could see a silver vehicle all smashed up a vehicle that was similar to Ricky's.

Wanting a closer look she got john out of his seat and carried him closer. When she did this she was able to get a better view of the car and nothing could prepare her for what she saw.

"Bobby!" Shouted the EMT carrying the stretcher "where is those jaws? This kid is fading fast I need to load him up now!"

Just then Bobby brought back a large device grabbing hold of the smashed in passenger door three attempts did it the door broke off and they loaded the young man on the stretcher, he was badly injured and losing too much blood too fast. The EMT strapped him down shining a bright flashlight into his eyes

The young man had his fist clenched tight and with a horse voice managed to choke out "Amy" before everything went black again.

Amy was about to fall. She watched as they brought the jaws of life out and dragged a young man to a stretcher, she could see his face now and it was way too much to take in. John was beside her crying for an unknown reason she wasn't paying attention as bad as that sounds but she wasn't all she did was fixate her eyes solely on the young man feet from her.

"Bobby he lost conciousness! And his pulse is barely here we need to get this kid out of here now!"

Amy dropped johns hand and stood frozen, a cop next to her noticed "Miss, are you ok?" Amy said nothing still frozen

"Um miss?" he waved his hand in front of her face "young lady are you alright there?' still nothing.

John remained crying so the cop took the little boy by the hand and walked over to the squad car with him.

Amy rushed over to the scene as fast as her legs would carry her, the entry was barricaded by cop cars, EMTs and tape they were letting nobody in.

She yelled frantically at the workers "I need to get in please!" a cop gently pushed her back "sorry miss this is a closed off area"

"but you don't understand I need to get by here! THAT'S MY FINACEE!

The cop said nothing only guided her to the scene holding onto her tight afraid she would trip or fall.

John sat with the cop who had taken his hand minutes ago he was still frantically screaming "daddy!" he cried out causing the two cops to exchange a look.

Once inside she bolted towards the ambulance where they are loading the stretcher. she can fully see him now. Ricky's heavily strapped to a stretcher barely alive, she could see the damage of his body his leg was crushed the bone was poking out, his body bleeding heavily .

Amy stood next to him crying as she stuck her hand on his, It felt like ice against hers. His eyes were barely open, but tears and blood ran down his face, his breathing was shallow, he was fading fast.

Ricky's eyes opened slightly he coughed a few times before moaning his voice barely audible "w-w-where am I... John? Amy?"

Amy looked into his eyes "I'm here, I'm here" she paused letting the lump in her throat subside before speaking again. "Your on a stretcher, you were in a car accident" he tilted his head a bit taking in the sight around him "that bad huh?... I'm sorry Amy, for what I did" she patted his hand with one of hers and stroked his dirt and blood soaked hair "shhhh you have nothing to be sorry for Ricky I do and I promise when you get better things will be better" she gave him a small weak smile staring into his eyes.

Ricky's breathing had become short and forced as he said his last words, 'I love you Ames' he opened his hand revealing the ring as his heavily bleeding head began to droop tears sliding down his pale face as well as blood and his eyes closed.

Amy let out a cry like none other when his head fell to the side. One of the EMTs shouted "Get the defibrillators quick were losing him!"

She watched helplessly as the EMT shocked Ricky's fragile chest 4 times each time with no luck. After the 4th shock they pulled a sheet over his battered face and called it, He was gone.

Amy hit the ground her knees smacking the pavement, her body completely numb as she stared at her hands that were covered in blood,his blood; the blood of the man she loved, her reason for living, the father of her child, her best friend, was gone.

She remained on the hard pavement grieving. She heard her baby boy screaming but she couldn't move to get him, all she could do was remain on the ground her eyes lifeless and empty. She felt dead as though her life had been taken along with Ricky's, life was meaningless without him.

Amy stared into the puddle in front of her as horrible images attacked her vulnerable mind like a tiny horror film inside her brain. Images of telling John he had lost his only father, attending his funeral, her life without him, a shocking revelation of her in a hospital with a baby their baby. Flash after flash after flash until her last flash left her like a statue; it was her lying on a tile floor blood on her hands and pills scattered everywhere suicide, she had tried to commit suicide. She shook her head violently and the flashes vanished.

She still heard john screaming and she took that as enough of a reason to rise, her son was now her reason to move on with life. She walked slowly her legs barely shifting to over to her screaming child and held him in her embrace as his screams became small cries, holding onto his mother for dear life as they stood there without the man who completed their family.

Amy and John were escorted back to the apartment where it felt empty and lifeless, no excitement, nothing. John had fallen asleep but had awoken when placed on his parents sofa bed. His eyes were soft as he looked at his mommy, she was in a ball facing the other side of the room crying.

He walked over to the side of the sofa and put his face to hers and in a small voice he asked 'Why you sad mommy?' this only made Amy cry harder as she positioned herself in a sitting position on the bed and looked directly at the small 2-year-old boys red eyes and began to tell him what had happened, her voice broken with each word. "John something really bad has happened tonight, something that you may not understand yet but Daddy wont be coming home anymore" his eyes grew sad "why not?"

"Sweetie daddy got into a really really bad accident tonight and he didn't make it" It took everything in her to muster those words to her baby. He still didn't understand though so she took his tiny hands in hers and looked softly into his big brown eyes. "You might not understand this yet but someday you will, tonight when daddy had his accident he was taken away by a big van to a place. See when daddy was taken by the van he wasn't awake, he looked like he was asleep but he wasn't... see baby, daddy died tonight, he's not coming back to us. God took him up in the sky and he's looking down at us right now and he's really really sad like you and like me but we have to be strong because daddy loved us very very much and he wouldn't want us to be sad" she started to cry again and pulled away not wanting her son to see her cry.

John placed a hand on her shoulder and puckered his lip. She saw tiny tears brim at his eyes and held him close as they both cried.

**What did you think? Was it good or bad? Should I continue with it or give up writing forever? Let me know in a review! PS Please don't kill me for this chapter, there is much much more to this then meets the eye... **


	4. Saving Amy Part 1

**Ok so you all probably want to kill me for last chapter because it made you bawl, well it made me too so don't feel bad lol. Here is another chapter but it is a half chapter and its short, but that's only because the next chapter is longer and gives more detail to something in this chapter. I won't be updating for a while school is now in full swing and projects are taking my time but I try to write when I am on my office help day if I don't have work **

**Enjoy this chapter! :D **

5 days had passed; today was the day of Ricky's funeral.

It was 9am the service was scheduled to start at noon.

Amy was preparing herself for the service, as much as she just wanted to crawl into her bed, close her eyes and just shut the world out she knew it was time to face reality and accept that her true love was gone forever.

She looked in the mirror checking herself one more time dressed in her favorite black dress it the one she wore on her and Ricky's first official date, the one he told her made her take his breath away. She looked down at her side and saw John freshly bathed and dressed in his black suit Ricky had bought it for him after his 2nd birthday. The week he asked her and john to move in permentally.

Amy bent down to John's level taking his tiny hand and giving it a gentle kiss before rising hand in hand with him and walking out the door.

They arrived at the funeral home and were met with hugs from everyone. So many 'I'm sorry for your losses' and 'This is going to be a tough day for everyone' were heard from people attending the service.

Margret and Shakur were off near a tree, Amy could plainly see they were crying, who wouldn't? Ricky was their son.

Amy's tears began to come out but were hidden by her thick rimmed black sunglasses as she walked inside and saw what looked like everyone from school. It didn't make her that happy. This wasn't a social event it was a mourning ceremony for someone who filled the other half of her heart, it didn't need to be the gossip of the school.

She braved through it until she spotted her family, all stricken with the saddest faces she had ever seen. Hardly anyone spoke, just cried silently.

After about 30 minutes Amy and John walked over to the thing they had been trying to avoid. It was too painful to stare at, it didn't feel real she didn't want it to be real. But there it was his casket, golden bronze with a blue interior.

There he lay dressed in a black suit, his slick and soft puffy hair gelled back eyes closed and hands lay on his torso.

She brushed his cheek with her thumb; it was so cold against her skin. He looked so at peace like he had just fallen asleep. She used to always tease him because he slept like a dead person. John would call him a mummy sometimes because his arms would never move from their spot.

A tear escaped from inside her sunglasses down her pale face.

John was standing on his tip toes trying to see inside the casket. Amy lifted him into her arms so he could see his father. His eyes were red and lips puckered trying to not cry. John touched his father's cold lifeless hand before leaning over and kissing Ricky's cheek whispering "don't worry daddy, mommy be ok, I luh you" in his ear. When he arose back he buried his head into Amy's shoulder and started to cry.

She clutched into his tiny body scrunching his hair between her fingers and sobbed into her sons shoulder while just staring down at her deceased Fiancée.

A man in a suit touched her shoulder gently and informed her it was time to take her seat, the service was about to start.

She took a place next to Margret and shakur as the music began to play. the man asked if the people would please turn to face the screen in the front of the room, where it played a montage of Ricky's life. Mostly his life with Margret, Shakur, her family herself and John. The pictures played one by one each one causing a tear to fall. Then the video she had given to Margret and Shakur to put in the service began to play. –

**Yeah I know its short and I apologize for it. please don't kill me for Ricky's death because as I have said before there is more to this story then what you are reading now, so keep that in mind. As far as updating goes I am in school all day and currently working on other projects so I will try to update when I can. **

**Keep reviewing because they make me smile **


	5. Strawberry Avalanche

**I'm sure as many of you have heard by now Secret Life will be over June 2013. 5 seasons and it will be over – I blame that news partially on my lack of updating because it has really depressed me, I apologize for taking that out on this story. **

**Sorry for taking so long to update, life is hectic and busy right now with school and everything. I hope you all are still reading this considering it's been like a month since I updated- sorry about that. Here is the video mentioned in the last chapter- it is set as a video for the viewing people from last chapter but to you guys as readers its set as the actual day it was shot. Enjoy!**

**I don't own Secret Life if I did it sure as heck would not be ending so soon. -_-**

**(The Video)**

Ricky was being his usual self trying to work something he had rarely ever used in his life, Amy's video camera.

Amy was sitting at the table next to John refraining from laughing at her boyfriend's antics with the camera. Watching him punch a few buttons and grunting each time. He was sexy when he was frustrated.

Amy looked at john who was playing with a toy car on his highchair tray then looked back at Ricky still messing with that camera. She giggled and looked at john again "I guess it's time for mommy to step in huh buddy?" John smiled at her as he used his car to run over a cheerio. She got up and walked over to Ricky

"Be careful with that, it costs more than this apartment"

Ricky looked up from the lens with his famous '_oh really'_ face "Oh really now and since when did you become loaded?"

She gave him a sarcastic smile "Oh you don't know about my hidden treasury? It's very colorful" He clicked his tongue "uh huh show me"

"Fineeeee" she sighed before reaching into her pocket and pulling out an orange $500 bill.

Ricky's look was priceless "Really now monopoly money?"

Of course what did you expect I work at a daycare!"

He tried to keep a straight face but couldn't they both let out chuckles and smiled before Ricky punched another button, this time seeing his face on the piece attached "Yes, finally!" he said accomplished.

"Wow and it only took an hour, that's quite amazing" she mocked before walking over to john, Ricky followed.

"Did you hear that John, daddy finally learned how to work the camera! Yay daddy! Amy playfully said to John who clasped his tiny hands together.

Ricky smiled at his son before turning to Amy "Can we start now?" she put her arms to her side and pouted playfully "I guessss" she replied before disappearing down the hallway into the bedroom.

Ricky laid the camera on the table before going to the fridge to retrieve a white box which lay on the counter and pulled out the proper utensils. Amy walked back into the room laying a brightly colored box on the sofa before returning to her seat at the table, Ricky's back was to her so she watched him then got up to join him

"Need any-" she paused and looked down "what is that?"

Ricky continued pulling out utensils "what do you mean what is it? It's a cake Amy, you know a sweet treat usually served at birthday parties which hang on a sec" he looked around the room "we seem to be at" he smirked at her.

She retaliated with her famous '_You're an idiot'_ look "Ok Mr. sarcastic, I meant why is this cake that? What happened to the one I told you to get?"

"Well Amy it seems like Disney cakes run out very fast so I took what they have, so I give you this!" He put his arms out towards the cake "Its chocolate, johns favorite"

Ricky picked up the box and out it on the table away from johns reach. He put his hand on the table his hand hitting the table cloth, which isn't what he was wanting. He looked up confused "I swear I just put it here!"

John giggled which caused Ricky to look at him revealing what he was looking for. "Ah ha! I knew it was here. I guess a certain someone wanted to hide it from Me." he cocked his eyebrow at his sneaky now two year old son before reaching his hand out.

John giggled again and shook his head "No! Mine!" Ricky once again gave his '_Oh really'_ face putting one hand on the camera and the other one on the edge of Johns shoulder; slowly digging his fingertips into the crook of the little boys neck causing him to squeal in defeat, releasing his grip on the camera as Ricky slid it out of his grasp chuckling to himself.

Amy came to the table holding plates, cups and utensils. She looked at john who had a defeated look on his face while lightly chuckling "daddy got you again huh?" John nodded and pointed at his guilty father "Bad!"

"Ouch that really hurts my ego little man" Ricky replied sarcastically before taking the buddle of party supplies from Amy's hands and setting the table.

After the table was set everyone took their seats and put on their SpongeBob party hats. Ricky placed the camera on its tripod next to the table letting it capture everything. Suddenly it went off causing Ricky to curse at it when he tried to fix it again also prompting a look from Amy along with "watch your mouth will you!"

"Sorry geez!"

After fighting with that camera for another 5 minutes he finally got it working again and they started the party.

Amy pulled the cake closer to her "Look buddy" she nudged John "fishy!" he pointed and smiled

"Yeah it's a fish, do you know what kind of fish it is?"

"Ne-moo!"

"Did you hear that daddy its nemo."

Ricky looked at her "I'm two seconds away from shoving your face in that cake!

"Well you could have at least put his name on it!"

He grunted at her "I swear to you…. Shut up about it!"

"Well grrrrr to you too then Mr."

He said nothing and cut john a piece of the tail.

Ricky plopped the piece into a red and blue plate. He watched in amusement at his little man digging his fingers into the orange frosting; while pointed at the lens "Look at the camera buddy" John shook his head "no!" and shoved fistfuls of chocolate cake in his mouth.

Amy got herself a piece of the eye, unbeknownst that Ricky had removed himself from the table and was suddenly behind her. His hand clamped her head and plowed it straight down into the orange frosting, giving her a mouthful of cake.

He doubled over laughing hysterically at the sight of Amy's face decorated in dark frosting; little bits of cake still attached. John was squealing with laughter as well. Amy however was not laughing "ha-ha very funny you two" she crossed her arms over her chest "now come over here and kiss me you jerk!"

Ricky raised an eyebrow and pulled her close kissing her sweetly; smudging the mess into his face "Mmmm cake"

She smirked at him taking his belt buckle in her hand while the other was creeping behind her back. Managing to retrieve a few ice cubes she quickly slammed them down his pants. Ricky twitched at the sudden wetness dripping down his thighs.

This time Amy was doubled over with laughter as Ricky looked at her, a cocky grin on his face "Really Amy? That's the best you can do is ice?"

"It's payback baby!"

"That's ok because I know that you'll be licking it off later" he whispered seductively and gave a smirk.

Amy's eyes grew wide as she slapped his arm "Ricky! Your son is right there!" But the smirk never left his face.

They took their places back at the table; Ricky now sitting in his wet jeans and Amy having smeared cake all over her face, both turned their attention back to the red faced giggling little 2 year old. "What are you laughing at hmm?" Amy asked in a playful tone using her pointer finger to tickle his tummy. He giggled and pointed at her face "Mommy fun-nee!"

Ricky smiled "So little man you want to open your presents now?"

"YEH!" he squealed and clasped his hands together in excitement.

Ricky eased John out; still covered in orange frosting and handed him over to Amy who quickly cleaned him up and brought him over to the sofa. John began to tear open his presents which made his parents smile. He pulled out a medium sized plush dark brown bear from the brightly colored cardboard box; his eyes scanning the plush toy. "What is that buddy?" Amy asked excitedly. John gave her a big grin "Big Bear!" he said happily then turned back to the rest of the boxes.

After 45 minutes Amy and Ricky sat on the couch John was fast asleep in his mother's arms. Amy rested her head on Ricky's shoulder playing with his hands with her free hand before lacing his fingers with hers. He smiled at her "I'm sorry about earlier"

"It's ok, he had fun that's all that matters" she gestured towards a sleeping john

Yeah he did, and you have admit that was hilarious!"

"Uh huh you keep thinking that"

It was silent for a few seconds "hey Amy?"

"Yeah?"

"That was really good cake." He chuckled

"Oh shut up, and hand me that" she pointed at the video camera lying on the side table. He handed it to her and smiled "what are you going to do with it?"

"This" she opened the screen and flipped the button "get in this shot Ricky" He did as instructed

"Hey buddy mommy and daddy want to wish you a very very happy birthday! When you wake up I'll put this on again so you can give yourself a special message. We love you baby byeeee" she chuckled and lowered the camera

"Well that was a little cheesy"

"Well we are a cheesy little family so why not?"

"Alright then" He leaned his head into hers giving her lips a soft kiss. The camera was still on.

**My apologies for taking so long to update once again life is busy right now. Did you like the chapter? Let me know in a review **


	6. Saving Amy Part 2

**Hey hey! my lovely readers, good news, Secret Life's Christmas special is just days away! And some more good news, I actually updated! LOL I should give you all medals for being patient with my lack of writing and updating, haha! Seriously though I apologize for taking like a month to update this, everything has been so crazy lately I just haven't had the chance to write or correct any mistakes from earlier chapters. Here is a new update though! I thought I would give you all a nice break from the sobbing by writing last chapter but this one you are not so lucky. Get your tissues ready, as I present to you... Saving Amy Part 2! *sniffle, sniffle***

* * *

The video ended and silence took over. After about a minute of silence the minister began the usual long drawn out speech that a funeral always comes with, asking different people to come up and talk about the deceased.

Amy was called to say a few words; her movement was slow and shaky as she made her way to the podium, taking the microphone between her hands.

"Amy... you may speak now" the minister spoke softly. She sucked in a deep breath "R-Ricky w-was t-the lo-ove o-of my-my life-e" she began but after the word _love _her sentence became an array of sobbing. The minister gently patted the grieving young woman's back "That's ok Amy, you may sit now if you like" Amy unable to control her sobs took her seat as the service progressed.

The minister spoke for a few more minutes before releasing the crowd to the casket for the last time. Amy and John were last in line; they wanted to be the last to say their goodbyes to the only man who made them feel whole.

John was in his mother's embrace the tear stains clear on his tiny cheeks. He kissed his father goodbye for the last time, clutching his mother's arm crying once more. Amy lingered over the man she was supposed to share her life with cursing herself inside her head for letting herself be so stupid not to trust him in the first place. She took his cold lifeless hand for the last time "I love you Ricky, and always will, Now and Forever my love" placing a gentle kiss on the inside if his palm.

After the service and the burial everyone went their separate ways with sad eyes and broken hearts.

Amy and John drove to her parents' house. John ran off with Robbie while Amy sat alone in what used to be her room.

She stared around the room, hardly anything had changed but it felt so empty, so lifeless, much like her.

She hugged a pillow to her chest and just lost it right there; pounding the pillows until her hands hurt, releasing all those screams and loud cries she held in for the sake of John. She curled into a ball on her bed and closed her eyes.

Amy opened her eyes but she was no longer in her old bedroom, no she was in a land of peace.

Her thoughts soothed as she felt the grass prick her feet; looking to the left then the right she saw John behind a tree, a big grin on his face. He looked different, older and happier and was chasing a small little girl through the grass.

The little girl had thick curly brown hair draped down the sides of her face in pigtails with emerald-green eyes and small dimples on her cheeks. She was wearing a light pink dress with white lace trim.

The small girl looked over at Amy and smiled before running over to her, wrapping her small arms around Amy's legs.

Amy looked down, smiling as she bent down to the toddler's level and stared straight into her green eyes. It was like looking into a mirror, the child looked just like her.

John ran over to them the smile still on his face.

Amy took the girls tiny hand "who are you sweetie?" she asked confused.

The girl smiled while pointing "da-ee!" she shouted as she ran away giggling.

Amy arose still confused "why would she say daddy?" she thought but that's when it happened; "Hey you… its Amy right?" she turned around and saw him standing there.

He was dressed in a white shirt and white pants, a giant smile graced his face when he saw her.

She stood speechless, there was Ricky right in front of her not a damage done to his body; not a bruise or a scar, no cast or bandage, he was perfect.

Amy's steps where shaky and slow but the teary eyed smile grew with each step she took towards her one and only.

Ricky's features were fixated on the beauty walking towards him, fully aware his smirk was making his oh so famous dimples sink deeper into his cheeks.

She reached out, her hand brushing against his firm torso; half expecting her hand to go straight through, like he was a ghost and would vanish into thin air at the feel of her touch. Afraid she would go back to the cold loneliness of reality; but when she touched him he didn't vanish, instead he held firm and solid like his body had never left.

Her eyes were filled with joy as she moved into him closer; their faces just mere centimeters from each other, as she wrapped her arms tight around him.

He looked into her green eyes and moved his lips to hers, kissing her so passionately with so much power and love it pained him when she pulled away, the joy in her eyes never leaving.

Amy placed her hand into Ricky's and just stared at him "why are you staring at me like that" he questioned.

She sighed "because this doesn't feel real I'm expecting for you to just be ripped away from me at any moment"

His smile lessened into just a sliver as confusion filled his face. "What do you mean Ames I'm right here?"

She was about to say something when a loud giggling little girl ran up to them with arms up wide shouting "da-ee! da-ee!"

He looked down the smile back on his face as he reached out and picked the girl up giving her forehead a gentle kiss "hey baby girl what are you doing?" She smiled and pointed to john who was nearby "on! Run on run!" he chuckled "yeah that's john go get him!" he placed the child back on the grass and she took off running after john again.

Amy looked at Ricky more confused than ever. He noticed and stuck his hand out to her intertwining his fingers with hers "take a walk with me"

They walked through the grass hands locked together, before sitting on a small red bench. He sat first then gently pulled her towards him.

The sky was a pretty shade of light blue the gold from the sun shone over the horizon.

She laid her head on his shoulder her hand never leaving his.

It was silent for a few minutes only the faint sounds of children's giggles could be heard.

Ricky cocked his head to see the look on Amy's face which was something he couldn't place "Amy, you ok?"

She snapped out of the trace he thought she was in and looked at the ground "Yeah I'm fine just thinking that's all"

"Thinking about what? Come on Ames what's going on in that pretty little head of yours" he chuckled

"He misses you… you know… we all do"

Ricky's eyes were soft as he brushed her hand with his thumb "you know I miss you all too, but don't worry about me I'm fine but you're not" he took a deep breath "…Amy I've been watching you, seeing every tear you have cried, heard every word you spoke, every move you have made and it's so painful to see because when I look at you I don't see you; I see a lifeless and broken young woman who spends her days and nights beating herself up endlessly, even when she puts on a brave face her eyes are hidden not wanting anyone to see her"

He draws in another deep sign before continuing "I see the pain in her and it stabs me like a knife because I once knew the woman deep inside her. How her eyes sparkled when I looked at her, how she pouted when she didn't get her way, the way her long legs maneuvered when she walked, the strawberry smell of her hair and her beautiful smile that lit up a room."

He looked deep into her eyes letting a small smile cross his lips "I want to see the woman who even when she had a bad day it could be fixed with the slightest touch of happiness, the woman who stood up for anything she believed and wasn't afraid to fight for it, the woman who encouraged people to be their best and the woman who even though she was tired and moody always found the time to share a laughter filled moment with her son. That's the woman I remember, she's the one I want to see when I look down, not a broken one" he pushed a strand of hair behind her ear, his face stricken with a painful expression 'your blaming yourself for what happened aren't you?"

Amy said nothing only nodded as a tear was peaking its way to the brim of her eyes

"Amy it's not your fault, what happened wasn't because of you"

Amy looked at him with pain stricken eyes, tears sliding down her cheeks "b-but I-I'm t-he o-o-ne w-who pushed you away, the one who started the fight, the one who made you leave!" she softly shouted in protest.

"You know that's not true, I was the one who took the keys and drove, it's my fault not yours, quit beating yourself up over it, it happened Amy, I wish it hadn't but it did and there is nothing we can do about it. Let it go. Please. If not for me then do it for john, and…. "Ricky's eyes adverted to the grass as his words trailed off.

"And what? her gaze following his eyes. …"That little girl? Is sh- she…m-m mine?"

He sucked in a breath "she's… ours…yes"

Amy's lips puckered in the tears falling faster down her pale cheeks. Ricky watched as the tears fell from the brim of her eyes down her cheeks, using his thumb to brush them away "Please Ames, please don't cry anymore, show me the happiness I used to see. "He asked softly

"How am I supposed to do it?" she asked wiping a stray tear from her cheek.

"Do what?" he questioned with the slightest crack in his voice.

"raise 2 kids alone, they need you, they need a father in their lives right now, I'm not their father, I need you Ricky I need you more than anything please don't leave us!" she broke out into an array of hard sobs.

Ricky raised their intertwined hands giving hers a gentle kiss, before placing his other hand on her face, caressing her cheek as their eyes locked with each other's.

His voice was gentle "I'm not leaving you; I would never leave you, ever. I'm still with you every day maybe not in body but I'll always be in here" he raised their hands to her heart, "don't ever forget how much I love you. Every day you look up and see those precious angles we have you will see me. I'm always with you, Now and Forever baby."

He kissed her lips softly the tears making their way from the brim of his eyes, this time she brushed them away. He broke the kiss, cupping her soft cheek in his hands "Now do me a favor and open your eyes, the world awaits you show it your kind and gentle soul just like you did me. I'll be waiting patiently for you when time comes, but for now go on with life and be happy, raise our kids to love and laugh as you and I once did. Now open your eyes Amy, everything will be ok. Just open your eyes…"

* * *

**Sad chapter huh? I'm sorry please don't stab me with a fork for this chapter, for some it's a good thing! **

**I don't know when I will update next, depends on if I will ever finish the next chapter, its halfway finished! Stay tuned!**


	7. Holiday AN

**Hello lovely readers, Its Christmas today! I want to wish you all a very happy holiday season filled with laughter, love and good times. Also take the time to be thankful for everything you have and think of those who are not as lucky. Keep the families of the tragedy in Newtown, CT in your thoughts and prayers as they go through this holiday season. **

**I apologize that this is not an update, however, it will be very shortly- I hope anyway. I have a lot of ideas for this story and some are out weighing the ones I had planned originally, we will see what I decide though. **

**Have a very Merry Christmas everyone, and keep an eye out for an update **

**Love, Lizzie 3**


	8. Sidewalks

**Here, Here! I bring an update! I owe you all a huge apology for taking literally over a month to even start to type out an update, feel free to be mad at me. **

**So in the past chapters I have brought nothing but heartache and tears to this story, but I'm not apologizing! Just Kidding. I'm sorry, I did that to all you readers, especially after reading all your reviews, thank you for those by the way **

**From here to about I'd say 4 more chapters there is no sadness, so I gave you that at least. Let's forget that 4x20- to the present episodes have ever happened. They were mostly bad anyway, so keep the goodness of S4A fresh in your minds. Plus the new and last installment of SL comes back in just a little over a month!**

**Some people have told me that I need to make my chapters longer, so I kind of did with this one. Now it's time to read!  
**

* * *

"_Now open your eyes Amy, everything will be ok. Just open your eyes…"_

Her eyes shot open. Finding what was still there when she closed them. Her gaze went to her dark black clothing, feeling the emptiness consume her once more. Rising slowly she made her way to the window. "Why did this have to happen?" she questioned the now moonlit sky, putting her shaky palm to the cool glass, half expecting to have Ricky meet it with his own on the other side. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she gripped the framing of the window sill. Her knees began to give out, sending her aching body to the floor. Face down into the fuzzy carpet with her knees drawn in, she let out an ear-piercing scream; letting all the pain and sorrow and remorse for the loss she suffered flood her feeble body.

"_Amy…"_ came a distant whisper. Her hands pounded harder into the carpet hearing the whisper once more _"Amy…" _

"Amy… "Ricky whispered, shaking her shoulder gently, "Amy, wake up…"

Amy gasped and opened her eyes at the sound of his soft voice. Tears formed in her eyes when she saw his perfect face- alive and well.

Ricky stared down at her teary eyes, "You ok?" he asked in a soft whisper.

Amy bit her lip to keep it from trembling as her tears fell down her cheeks. Opening his arms to her, Ricky wrapped them around in a firm embrace. She buried her face in the sleeve of his shoulder, crying away the terrible nightmare her mind bestowed upon her.

Ricky tightened his grip "Nothing is going to get you now, I promise" he coaxed, giving Amy's temple a sweet kiss while rocking her gently against him in the silence of the night. _

**Next Morning **

Ricky was sleeping peacefully on his back, arms still securely wrapped against his fiancée; her body embraced tightly against him, clutching his t-shirt with her fist. The sound of a drum solo filled the silence of the tiny apartment. Ricky's eyes fluttered open, drawing in a deep sigh as he slowly started to remove himself from Amy's grip, careful not to wake her and headed towards the shower.

Once showered and dressed, Ricky emerged from the hallway; spotting Amy still sleeping with John sprawled out all over next to her. Chuckling to himself, he pulled out his phone, angling it just right before pushing the button.

Amy's body twitched slightly at the noise, causing her to roll onto her back, eyes sleepily trying to open as she let out a soft yawn, "mmm what time is it" she questioned sleepily.

Ricky shoved his phone back into the pocket of his jeans before looking towards the digits of the clock "7:15" he answered.

Amy draped her arm over her eyes "ughhh!" she groaned "why does it have to be so early!"

"Because the universe decided that they wanted you to get up" he enthused sarcastically.

She let out another small groan before removing her arm from her eyes. "Ugh, really john?", Amy groaned, gesturing to the small toddlers foot resting uncomfortably between her breasts; Removing it gently not to wake him, before slowly shaking herself awake and heading towards the kitchen.

John strolled into the kitchen moments later, rubbing his tiny fists against his eyes.

"Good Morning, buddy!" Amy chimed. His little feet walked slowly to his mother, whining as he outstretched his arms towards her.

Drawing John onto her lap, where he snuggled his small body into her, Amy pressed her pursed lips to his temple; kissing it softly, her eyes filling with concern. "Hey Ricky, can you come here a sec?"

Ricky set his half full cereal bowl on the counter and walked over to the table. "What's wrong?"

Amy's gesture went towards John "Tell me if he feels warm to you" Ricky placed his hand against John's forehead, his eye brows furrowing. "Yeah he is a bit warm; I'll look for the thermometer". John began to whimper into her shoulder. "Its okay baby"she coaxed while laying her hand on Johns head, playing with his messy, shaggy hair.

Ricky re-entered the room with the thermometer, placing it in Amy's free hand. She took the cone-shaped tip and placed it firmly in Johns right ear, causing the little boy to let out an ear-piercing shriek- the discomfort now clear to his parents. Amy's face was clear she now knew what was wrong and placed the device in the opposite ear. After a minute the device beeped, its green digits reading 101.3. Amy removed the thermometer from her sons' ear and laid it on the table top in front of her, meeting Ricky's confused gaze. "He's got another ear infection" she exclaimed.

"Are you sure this time? Maybe he just has a fever".

Amy's eyes shot up at him, "We are not doing this again, Ricky, we're just not. He's sick you know it and I know it so let's just get this over with" annoyance laced in her tone.

Ricky's eye scanned the whimpering two-year old carefully. Analyzing every aspect to make sure Amy was right, which she was. John's cheeks were red as beets; his tiny body snuggled tight into Amy, whimpering slightly while attempting to grab his ears. He sighed "Fine you win"

"Thank you! _Now if you will excuse me,_ I'm going to shower" She stood up and handed John to his father, who rested the boy against his shoulder as he watched Amy walk away.

Ricky opened the wooden cabinet by the fridge, revealing a medium-sized bottle of Children's Tylenol. Using his free hand to remove the small plastic cup, he opened the child proof cap; pausing for a moment to retrieve the small baby syringe that was kept, in a plastic bag, in the corner of the cabinet.

He used the syringe to absorb the medicine before strolling over to place john in the high chair- he was getting way too big for. Taking a seat next to his son, he attempted to spoon feed fruity pebbles into John's mouth. Ricky got about 4 good bites of cereal in. "No more!" John whined, pushing the spoon away.

"You need to eat more buddy. This medicine I'm going to give you says you have to be full or you will get sick. So come on just 2 more bites, that's it." Ricky pleaded pushing another giant spoonful of cereal towards the 2 year old- who of course smacked it away, causing the spoon to flip and the food to fly. "Great" Ricky grunted as he stood. Grabbing a paper towel from the rack to swiftly wipe the mess John created, he pressed a wet rag onto the floor to absorb the liquid.

Once that was finished he grabbed the baby syringe off the table and walked back over to john, who was using his hands to feed himself. "I thought you didn't want anymore?" he questioned his son, who just looked at him. "Alright little guy it's time for this" he gesturing to the instrument in his hand, slowly pressing the tip of the syringe to Johns lips. John puckered his face and refused to let the liquid slide past.

Ricky- frustrated and tired- inched the syringe closer. Knowing John was barricaded inside the high chair was an advantage. Fidgeting his small torso away, Johns lips parted "nooooo" he whined. Seeing John's mouth open to wine louder in protest, Ricky quickly shoved the tip inside and pressed the plunger- sending all the red liquid in a heap into the child's mouth.

"There, all done!" he said proudly. John coughed and cried in response reaching his small arms out to his father who, took the boy to the sofa bed and rested comfortably beside him.

* * *

Ricky peeked over to see Johns eyes closed, a light congested snore coming from him. He looked at the clock, gently removing himself from the mattress and walked towards the bathroom door.

Amy was still in the shower humming softy, the room filling with steam. A devious smile crossed Ricky's lips as he drew the curtain back. "Eeekkkk" Amy screeched, "You scared me, you jerk!" She shouted while attempting to cover her bare chest with her hands. His lip curled up seductively, eyes scanning her naked figure, "mmm".

Amy caught his eyes and bit her lip. Curling her index finger, motioning for him to come closer- he obeyed. "Hi" she said, seduction laced in her tone, draping her arms around his broad shoulders-soaking his medicine splattered t-shirt.

"Hi" Ricky repeated in a husky whisper, looking deep into her lust filled eyes. Her lips found his, slow and sweet. Amy pushed her body closer to him- feeling his strong hands roam up and down her bare skin.

Hearing a small cry from the other room, they pulled apart, breathless. Amy removed her hands from his shoulders as Ricky removed his hands from her bare body, a deep sigh coming from them both. "That's my cue, I guess" He pulled away from the shower to go out the door.

"You awake now little man?' he questioned, removing his now soaked t-shirt from his torso. Walking over to the sofa, he picked John up and gently placed him on the floor. Ricky gathered up all the blankets from the mattress and with one hard push, pushed the mattress into the sofa; Swiping John back into his grip and sitting on the now made sofa. John's chubby fists rubbed into his eye sockets, as the crying got louder.

Amy breezed through the living room to take the screaming toddler from his father. Who, she could tell was beginning to get aggravated. Ricky went to get a new shirt from the bedroom. "Daddddyyyy" came the muffled cries once more. Ricky returned, "See ya later" kissing Amy's temple.

"You sure you don't want to go with us?" she questioned almost pleadingly.

"I would but I have to work… sorry" he answered.

"It's ok"

"You sure? I mean I can level something with Bunny, I guess."

"No. That's ok, we need the money. Plus it's not like this is my first time taking him to the doctor. "

"Yeah, I know" he paused a moment. "Be good for mommy, buddy" Brushing his hand along the side of johns head before giving his forehead a gentle kiss.

"Daddyy noo byyyee byyeee" John slurred between his saliva creating sobs- which, was starting to soak his shirt.

Ricky gave his son another kiss on the forehead. Looking Amy in the eyes "bye" he pecked his lips to hers and walked out the door; leaving Amy to reason with her restless toddler. "Daddddyyyy noooo byeee byeee" he cried holding onto his right ear. Amy let out an exhausted and aggravated sigh "John your just going to hurt your ear more if you keep crying, baby" she tried to coax. When his crying ceased slightly she took the small boy to get cleaned up.

* * *

"What is going on up there? Are you killing the poor kid?" Bunny walked up beside Ricky who was packing meat into a labeled box. His eyes shot up as he faced the red-head. "What? No. At least I hope Amy isn't anyway."

"Ok so why does it sound like someone is screaming bloody murder up there, hmm?"

"One word- John." Just then Amy came down with a still screaming John. Her expression was restless and tired as she walked right up to Ricky and Bunny; John squirming in her arms. "Now I see why" was Bunny's response.

"Does that offer about you going with us still stand?" Amy questioned trying to talk over the screaming, while adjusting the red hood of johns' jacket on his head. Ricky looked from John, to Amy to Bunny. Bunny titled her head up "Go on, We got it."

Ricky wiped off his apron and grabbed John from Amy- both silently thanking Bunny before walking out the door.

* * *

The car came to a halt as Ricky pulled his silver Hybrid into a vacant space in the parking lot. Drawing out a long breath, he grabbed a very sleepy John out of his car seat and met Amy's hand with his own.

The trio walked into the large brick building; pictures of children and animals lined the walls leading to a large gray door with a silver hooked handle. Gripping the cold silver with his free hand, Ricky opened the door- letting Amy in before himself. Amy's eyes glanced around the room, seeing the many mothers with their children.

Ricky brushed her shoulder with his palm, "I'm gonna go find us a place to sit". She nodded slightly turning to the small reception window on her left. "Juergens" she informed a spiky brown-haired nurse, who handed her a small clipboard with paper attached. "Sign those" the nurse informed, handing her a pen.

Ricky found a small sector off to the corner of the busy waiting room, weaving through small children with toys, before sitting down. Placing John as comfortably on his lap as possible, he maneuvered his right hand under the toddler's arm- holding firm. Amy walked slowly to the spot next to Ricky, drawing her body closer into the chair. Reaching out, she grabbed Ricky's left arm and rested gently against it, snuggling in closer, in the crevice of his torso.

"Comfy?" he asked, lacing his fingers with hers- which lay against her knees. She nodded. "Good". Craning his neck slightly to kiss her head before laying his own against the cold wall.

Moments later Ricky felt a swift twitch of a small foot against his calf. One eye slowly opened as the whimpers began; he could feel the wetness of the tears against his thin, white t-shirt. The whimpers became smaller but louder cries, causing his other eye to open. Now fully awake, he looked down at his son, who had tears rolling down his small pink cheeks.

"Owwwwwiieee" John cried, pressing his tiny hands to his right ear, saliva gathering at the corners of his mouth. Ricky pulled John closer into him and reached for his diaper bag that was sitting next to him. With his hand semi free, he pulled out the blue and black Sippy cup that was resting in the holder on the right; handing it to john to keep him quite.

After what felt like forever, a blonde nurse called out the door, "Juergens".

Amy quietly stood, gathering their belongings; Ricky carefully eased john off his lap to stand up himself, taking the small boy by the hand.

The nurse led the three to a blue colored room, where green dinosaurs stretched across the borders of the walls. Amy took a seat on a black plastic chair lining the wall next to the child exam table.

Once inside the small room the nurse extended a hand out "come on little guy, let's go see how big you've gotten" she said sweetly. John hesitantly accepted and placed his chubby hand into hers, walking towards the door.

The two disappeared down the hallway to a small little room off to the right, where various scales and machines sat.

John's eyes scanned over the machines, his sight set on a black scale with a rod sticking out. "Wats dis?" he questioned, letting go of the nurses' hand to point at the object.

"That is a scale, that's how we measure how big and tall little boys like you are" she answered, pointing at his head in a playful way. "Can you do me a favor and take off your shoes, so you can step on this scale Huh, can you do that for me?" she questioned the small boy.

John bent down to undo the black Velcro attached to his black and red sneakers, with the help of the nurse before stepping on to the scale.

"Alright, now hold really still and stand straight" she ordered. The toddler stared straight ahead, the rod touching the tip of his nose. "3 feet, 2 inches and 40lbs, wow you're a tall little peanut. Let's go tell your mommy and daddy!" He nodded and followed out the door.

Amy and Ricky sat side by side in the little blue room, both texting on their phones. "Wow… just, wow" Amy said aloud, breaking the silence- starring intensely at her phone screen.

Ricky looked up from his own phone to see what her sudden outburst was about "what, what happened now."

"Lauren just told me that Madison was by her locker running her mouth yet again about me and Lauren. Can you believe that skank!" she shouted a little too loudly, looking at Ricky who just rolled his eyes.

"Don't you think you should break away from this petty teenage girl drama Amy? I mean I get that you are mad about what happened and all but it's done and over. It's time to get over it and shouting about how you think your ex friend or whatever is a skank is not the answer, and this is certainly not the place for its" he scolded.

Amy glared at him but before she got a chance to respond to his scolding, John rushed through the door. "Hey buddy" Ricky greeted, signaling for John to sit next to him "C'mere".

John walked towards his father, placing his hand on Ricky's left knee. Ricky smiled down at the boy, who returned the same gentle smile. "So how did everything go?" he asked, looking from john to the nurse on his right.

"Good" John chimed jumping a little from his spot, hitting his moms' foot. "Ow" Amy said nonchalantly, still typing out a text; prompting a silent look from Ricky.

"Des what daddy, I got big!" John shouted excitedly clearing sensing the tension between his parents.

"Yes you did." The blonde nurse nodded. "He's now 3 feet -2 inches and 40 lbs; he's a big little guy!

"Wow!" said Ricky in his child's excitement voice. "High five!" The boy gave his excited father a hardy high-five and giggled when Ricky flung his hand exaggerating the pain. "Ow buddy not so hard" he grinned.

Dr. Hightower poked her head through the metal framed door. "Can I come in?" The blonde nurse nodded "I'll be back later" smiling and walked out the door. The metal door closed with a clink against the frame as Dr. Hightower strode over to the child examine table, laying her clipboard on the corner; motioning for John to sit on the table as well. "Can you come up her with me please?" she asked. Ricky lifted him on the table, sliding the red hood off to slide John's messy hair down.

"How are you, John?" Dr. Hightower asked the red hooded boy. Amy- who had finally put her phone away answered. "He's got another ear infection. "

"Oh no, that's not good. No not good at all." she said in a voice John would better understand; stooping in front of him; Pulling out a long, white thermometer from its holder. "Can I take your temperature?" John nodded slowly, allowing the object to slide into his mouth. A minute passed marking the beep of the white object. "Hmmm well, your temperature says 99.8." Pulling a stethoscope from her neck, and plugging her ears moved the big cold piece to the black fabric of Johns, Cars t-shirt. "Hmmm well you don't sound congested either. What's going on little guy, hmm?" John moved his hand to his right ear, touching it lightly "owwie."

Dr. Hightower retrieved a black instrument with a cone-shaped tip, from the metal holder on the wall. Bringing the cold device to the toddler's ear. Feeling the cold and the pressure from the medical instrument, John let out a shriek. The doctor ignoring Johns cries -moved the device deeper, letting the bright light at the end show into the child's ear further. The shrieking got louder before Dr. Hightower pulled the instrument out completely, a solemn expression on her face. "Well, John doesn't have an ear infection. However, he does have a lot of wax build up inside that ear, and judging by when I looked in his mouth to take his temperature; his tonsils are enlarged quite well. Probably what's causing his screaming fits, the pressure from both of them." She said calmly.

Ricky and Amy gave each other confused looks. "So what's that mean, exactly?" Amy asked.

"It means 3 things. 1) John has to have all that wax removed. 2) He more than likely needs tubes in his ears for his constant ear infections. And 3) I would recommend removing his tonsils early, so that he won't be in as much pain, since they are rubbing against his throat." Dr. Hightower exclaimed.

"So wait… He needs… Surgery?" Ricky questioned hesitantly.

"Yes, I would strongly recommend it for him."

Amy gave Ricky a scared look. "So when will it happen?" she asked.

"Tomorrow."

* * *

**I finally updated, so what did you think? Are you pissed it was only a dream that Ricky died or are all you guys really happy? Let me know what you think in a review : P Btw thank you for reading, I know you all are probably pissed off at me for not updating in like 3 months. I'm sorry; I'm striving to try harder if that helps. **


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